The Dream Weekend!

My first weekend at my new house was kind of a liberating experience… I had guests staying over, losers dropping by anytime they want, for food and for making fun of me at MY OWN HOUSE, drawing room “mishaps”, staying out till midnight without having to face the wrath of parents/security/warden, fooling around with the cooking gas (cooking is too strong a word to use for preparing Maggie and omlette but yeah, I am getting there, slowly), making people jealous about my house and trying on a combination of nail polish, sunscreen n foundation at 3:00 a.m. in the morning!

And yes, CLEANING THE TOILET FOR THE FIRST TIME IN YOUR LIFE really really liberates you from whatever inhibitions you may have left…

The Theory of Beer Equivalence!

I survived the first week in the Mumbai office, still in training, and still not much work, and lots of free coffee, free water (yes, I understand the value of water now that I have to BUY it) and full fledged social networking! And since I am not much of a cook (I mean NO cook), I have all my meals in the office cafeteria only. May be that’s the reason I am blessed with a work station in one corner right next to the door which leads to the café, so that I can slip out unnoticed umpteen number of times! Well, when I am not in the café, I am chatting with my padosi who also has no work and whose motto in life is, “eat till you are sleepy, and sleep till you are hungry”. Now in the past five days, after n cups of coffee, long lunches, and roadside dinners, we have come up with three very important theories:
1. The Theory of Aesthetics and Privacy
2. The Theory of the Coffee Machine
3. The Theory of Beer Equivalence

Then Friday was Impact Day when all the employees of our company the world over go on the streets to work for a cause that they are passionate about. And then there are people who are forced to register for causes about which nobody is passionate about. So I was in one such thread, “Road safety” with a couple of other friends. So finally what was supposed to be a long, tedious day in the sun, turned out to be not just that, but more, especially since we kept slipping in and out of the nearest CCD! However it was a pretty cool experience given that we got to scare people pretending that we were these hotshots masquerading as police proxies.

I am still getting used to domesticity, still getting used to grocery shopping, still wasting money on locksmiths, plumbers, electricians and broadband connections. I still can’t imagine that things I took for granted till a week ago, actually required so much of hard work! And yes, I am also a host now! Nidhi is staying with me tonight, and I am monitoring her progress for her exam tomorrow. But why do people inflict so much torture on themselves VOLUNTARILY by writing exams at this age is beyond me…

MY house, MY life!

Last night was mind boggling, unbelievable, something that happens once in seven years for me! I actually slept in MY VERY OWN ROOM, all by myself!! No loud noises, no sleeping with lights on, no screaming in the background, and definitely no getting up stealthily because you are scared to wake your room mate. Mind you, all of it was fun for seven years, and hostel life was THE BEST phase of my life, but now, that I have been there, done that, I crave for this little corner all to myself, my little space where I can do whatever I like and not do what I don’t like! I know shelling out one fourth of my salary on rent is simple stupidity (as have been pointed out many a wise individuals) but I am willing to pay that price: alcohol and partying are important to some people, privacy is important to me, and just to make sure I justify the exorbitant amount of rent, I have decided to spend quality time at home, with myself, almost as if to enjoy that privacy that I am paying for so dearly!

But yeah, things I like about my new house (this even after getting locked out of my room for an hour and paying the locksmith a ridiculous amount to get me inside-

1. The closet space: you can’t imagine the thrill of at last seeing ALL my clothes and accessories together at one place! For seven years I have lived out of a suitcase, where one third of my outfits were stuffed in some bag, which never saw the light of day, and therefore I never had a chance to wear them!
2. The fact that it’s so ridiculously close to my office, so close that even autowalas refuse to drive at times. Five minutes of travel time in Bombay is a rare luxury!
3. That it is close to the Hiranandani main market which makes all the hip places accessible, yet far enough to enjoy the serenity of suburban life!
4. The hall, the cane furniture, the homely feel to it, which makes you want to come home and invite people too!
5. And ahem, the kitchen! I am no cook by any stretch of imagination, but I like the idea of having our own fridge, our own corner where we can store our favourite fat free ice cream (such a thing doesn’t exist by the way) and make what we want, even if it’s just Maggie or omlette or sandwich!

Giving up but not giving in...

So I gave up… it wasn’t easy, and it wasn’t impulsive as is the case usually with me. For a change, it was backed by cold hard logic. Painful as it was, empty as it felt, still it was the most sensible thing to do. And two weeks into my job, I have already started being sensible, pragmatic and definitely a stronger person. The long hours and the tiredness helps! Less time to brood, less time to obsess and less time to think (in fact less ability to think)! It gave me a strange sense of freedom though and right now, freedom seems a rare and cherished luxury…

I offered the best of me, but didn’t settle for something less; I gave up, but I didn’t give in; it was a sacrifice, but it wasn’t a compromise; I lost something precious, but I didn’t lose myself…

SO WHAT?

So I am halfway through my training, most of which involved “analytical thinking”. I am not sure that you can alter the way a person thinks in a 3 hour session, but what do I know… I am a new hire and I am supposed to behave like one, i.e. enthusiastic, eager, excited… As if the long "thinking" sessions aren't enough, we are also encouraged to "ask questions" especially "So What?" and at the end of it all, the only question I am left asking is, "When is the lunch break?" which isn't looked upon too kindly. Other than analytical thinking, another much abused term is “networking” and we have been strictly instructed to “network” with as many people as we can: seniors, colleagues, HR, operations, IT and anybody and everybody “from whom we can learn and who can be helpful in future”. Strangely getting along and liking the person aren’t really important enough reasons to “network”! So yes, I did learn a lot in my weeklong training. The weekend was wasted in trying to pass inane online exams, one of which I flunked 8 times but finally, much to my relief, I have managed to clear them all.
Much to my surprise, I have been politely informed by a friend that people who don’t know me too well (i.e. the other new hires) don’t like me too much because I come across as rude, unfriendly, unapproachable, introvert and sarcastic. So I get upset when people avoid me or don’t initiate a conversation with me even if I don’t exactly like them. The idea is that I can be rude to them, ignore them¸ but not the other way round. In a perfect world where I live, things should work the way I want them to, i.e. others should love me, they should die to talk to me and they would consider me as the most fascinating person EVER while I can be judgmental, moody and basically a nuisance…

Bottomline: It’s an unfair world, but so long it’s unfair in my favour, I don’t really mind!

THE PLEDGE!!

I am back Hyderabad after a year, back in Silicon Valley guest house, back to smiling familiar faces, all ready to start a new journey, to begin a new phase in life. A couple of weeks of training and induction and I am back to Mumbai, where I belong. So I begin work officially from tomorrow, and today being the last day of freedom, will solely be devoted to my favourite pastime, i.e. mindless thinking and obsessing about irrelevant little things and deriving a perverse pleasure out of it! Strangely, I am not as excited as I should be about this whole new beginning: may be because I have worked before, or may be because I did my summers here and so it’s not so new an experience or may be just that I am not the kind who gets super excited about a corporate career. I am more preoccupied with my new life in Mumbai, my new house and my potential dysfunctional relationships.

But now that I AM a part of this jungle, now that I am formally and legally bound to this terrible thing called “the corporate rat race”, now that I have gracefully agreed to be a part of this rut, here is my PLEDGE before I embark on this journey which has trapped many an innocent soul:

I will NOT sacrifice myself at the altar of corporate rat race…
I will NOT sacrifice my self respect to climb up ANY ladder…
I will NOT compromise on my values, my principles and my beliefs (whatever little I have)…
I will NOT suck up to people, bitch behind people’s back or go to extreme lengths to fast track my career…
I will NOT be unethical, unfair, partial or dishonest…
I will NOT get personally involved with the people I work, especially if they happen to be (un)happily married bosses…
I will NOT lose perspective, forget who I am, forget my social life, family or my hobbies in my race to the top…

Finally, I WILL always remember that at the end of the day it is JUST A JOB (yes, even in this recession) and not what I REALLY want to do, and therefore I should continue to pursue my dreams…

I love my dad, I am so proud of him and I think I am the luckiest daughter EVER, but I DO NOT WANT TO BE LIKE HIM!!!!

Scent of a Woman

The Blue Lady… that’s my perfume these days: it’s small, no-frills and probably the most “sensible” perfume I have ever used. I had tried it once before, but then got carried away with more exotic fragrances (Escada, Calvin Klein, even Dior). So now that my bank account has only a unidirectional cash (out)flow, this is the safest option that I can possibly afford. It’s reasonable, it’s familiar, and it’s comforting. And I have this thing for blue or any shade of it (turquoise obviously is my favourite). But yeah, I like the feel of it, I like the way it clings on to me and I like the faint scent of it on my clothes ages later after I had worn it as I try to remember the occasion for which I had dressed up. And then I smile and then I go back to thinking as I look at the bottle right next to me…

Singapore Sojourn

These last few months have been a sort of a walk down the memory lane for me, literally! I have traveled a lot, and mostly to places where I had been as a kid, with my parents. And last week, I decided suddenly to take off to Singapore: my first international trip as an adult, and I first trip abroad ALONE! Usha Aunty (who remains the sole grown up and sensible reader of my blog) had suggested it a few times, and I assumed she was serious about it and invited myself to her house (there are rumours that Aditya didn’t much like my company but I of course, refuse to believe it… who in his right mind, will NOT enjoy my company?)

The last time I went there some nine years back I did the usual “tourist” spots: Sentosa Island, Night Safari, Zurong Bird Park and actually tried shopping at Orchard Road (and got super depressed). But this time, I am older, more matured and grown up, and therefore I didn’t want to follow the beaten path and tried something different (read, Aditya refused to go shopping with me) and made me walk seven hours a day, but I am not complaining! So yes, we actually explored unheard of places like the Sungei Buloh rainforest, trekked through Changi beach park, got a bit of the local flavour at Chinatown and instead of burning money at the much touted river cruise through Clarke Quay, we decided to explore it on foot, and get up, close and personal to the famous Merlion, pose for pics at the lit-up CBD and Fullerton Hotel. Besides of course, the usual visit to the Singapore Zoo, the Botanical Gardens, the Sun Tek mall and Mustafa were done.

The public transport (the buses and the MRT) ensures that even strangers to the city will feel completely at home and after five days of traveling up and down the country, hopping from one route to another across three different lines, I was as much at home as I am with the Mumbai local trains. As far as I could see, in spite of being an expensive place, the people there were a pampered lot, and yet I was told that they ranked very low on the happiness index! I suddenly felt a stab of anger at our political set up, at our leaders and the government, for not doing enough for the country as I experienced the fruits of labour by a small country which had virtually no natural resources, no industries and which had to depend on other countries for even basic necessities. But I also felt “country sick” as I missed India, in all its miseries, dirt and dust…

However the high point of my trip was definitely being with Aditya’s family, the warmth with which they made me a part of their family, the enthusiasm with which they showed me around the city even though they had seen those places so many times before, and the way it felt like home even though I was thousands of miles away from home. Usha Aunty’s idlis, uncle’s cheerful anecdotes, Aditya’s smart alec sarcastic comments and the choice of dessert every night (yoghurt, pure chocolate ice cream, crunchy chocolate ice cream fruit and nut chocolate and bitter chocolate) ensured that I was spoilt to the core!

Some interesting observations:
1. Tamil is one of the official languages there
2. It has the most number of IIM grads after Delhi
3. The custom is that if you are invited to a wedding in Singapore, you are expected to pay money (per head basis) for attending the wedding
4. Grandmothers are paid for baby sitting children when both parents are working (my grandmother would have been a millionaire there)
5. The localites do not have the concept of cooking: so kids have breakfast at Subway, lunch at KFC, coffee at Starbucks and dinner at the foodcourts

I can go on and on about how grateful I am to Usha Aunty and how much I enjoyed my stay there, but nothing I say will do justice to it. Besides I promised that I wouldn’t belittle it with words like “thanks”, “obliged, “indebted” and I am going to stick by it. But yeah, it was a memorable trip for sure…

And for all those losers who are alarmed that I would just land up at their place with no warning and are determined that they would never ever extend an invitation to me for the sake of politeness because I accept it, you guys need not worry. (Aashay you esp)…

The "RIGHT" choice!

I think logic, rationality and judgment are over rated: I mean, most of the important decisions are taken on the spur of the moment, more with your heart than your head. My mom always says that choosing your spouse and choosing your house are very similar, and at that time I used to laugh it off, but now that I have been through it, I can actually understand what she is talking about. I was terrified about finding accommodation in Mumbai, terrified about dealing with brokers and landlords and most of all, terrified about choosing the “right” place given the plethora of options (as expensive as all of them are). But yesterday on my very first day of house hunting, I fell in love with the very first house I set my foot on. As soon as I entered the hall, it almost screamed to me, “this is it, this is my home”. It just “felt right”. I didn’t have to reason with myself, I didn’t have to convince myself, I didn’t have to weigh the pros and cons: it all fell in place as it happens so often with the “right thing”, “the right person” and “the right job”. The rent, the location, the flatmate- it all worked out in a matter of hours. Thereafter I visited a few more houses, but none of them seemed “right”. I don’t believe in the concept of “love at first sight”, but so far that’s the way it has been for me. Even for my job, that’s the way it happened: first company on campus for summers, my first interview, and from the beginning I knew it felt right for me irrespective of its aspiration value to other people- the profile, the money, the offer: none of it was exactly an envious proposition for most people, but it was sooo perfect for ME. May be, just may be, it’s not all HR crap, when they talk about the “perfect fit”. It does exist, as it does for the “right” house, the “right” car, the “right” watch, the "right" political party (may be not, because it doesn't exist) and the “right” relationship…

Lesson learnt: If you have to think too much about something, may be it’s not worth thinking about and this is NOT an excuse to NOT THINK!

Yeh Hai Bombay Meri Jaan

Finally Deloitte decided to divulge the precious precious secret about my location, and YES, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, Mumbai it is, and as an icing on the cake, I also got the sector I wanted, i.e. BFSI (Banking and Insurance). Not that all of this matters much, but they are extremely good for your short term happiness. So I kind of love this company; loved it ever since it came on campus a year and a half ago for our summers. Also fresh out of my trip to Singapore (more on it, in my next post), I have realized that while I love traveling, I love visiting new places and meeting new people, it also makes me “country sick” as opposed to homesick- I miss the dirt, the dust, the chaos and the warmth of Mumbai…

For the next few years at least, this city is going to be my home again, and this time, instead of fighting it out in pigeon holed PGs and ladies’ hostels, I am going to live life queen size (which in Mumbai terms means a small room to myself and I am super excited at this luxury). So yes, I have a spanking new office in Powai, reasonable accommodation (again in Mumbai terms) and a good friend (read adorably tolerable) as a flatmate who specializes in making omlettes, solving OR problems, drinking and looking gorgeous. In a way I am far flung from the humdrum of city life, away from the local trains which have been an integral part of my life in Mumbai and as my dad says, “I will be near enough to save him the airfare, but far enough to not get on his nerves”. So yes, I am looking forward to having my own cosy little home, decorating it my way, shopping for curtains, cutlery and cookies, inviting friends for dinner (and then ordering pizza when they can’t stand my cooking) and clutching at my hair when all the bills come…

Say hello to a new me, a new life, a new beginning, but most importantly, a new Mumbai which is still Mumbai