Big Yellow Taxi

3 a.m.! the streets are empty, the taxi races by, the driver adjusts the rearview mirror, the music slowly fades away, its cold outside, roll up the windows, no not all the way up, just a little bit, the seat cover is torn, a drop trickles down on it, then another, and another, a stray noise in the background, the dog barks, the amber light flashes, the ruffled hair, a tinge of lipstick, tired feet, the half-smile, the deafening silence…

High, but high enough?
Mad, but mad enough?
Giving yourself away, but giving enough?

Sophia and Sofia

I am at an age where I go all “awwwww” when I look at a baby, I stare longingly at cute kids’ outfits at malls (even though they are obnoxiously expensive) and I am a complete sucker for cheeky baby talk! Babies are like this desirable, out-of-the-world objects who have you wrapped around their little finger- one toothy grin and you forget how annoying they are!
So Webstar and I were discussing how we are going to spoil and pamper our kids and how differently they would be brought up!

Webstar: My kid will wear branded clothes from Gini and Jony…
Me: Mine will wear my old clothes…
Webstar: My kid will always be neat and well taken care of and smelling good…
Me: My kid will be untidy, with torn buttons and disheveled hair and mud all over…
Webstar: My kid will have birthday parties at Pizza Hut…
Me: Mine will have her friends over at home- home made cake and bhelpuri…
Webstar: My kid will play basketball and tennis and learn swimming with all those cute balloon floaters on them…
Me: My kid will play kabaddi and kitkit and pittu and kumirdanga on the streets and I will just push them into the nearby pukur (pond) and let them gasp their way through - the way I learnt swimming…
Webstar: My kid will be the coolest kid around with the latest technology and modern gadgets…
Me: My kid will be as technologically challenged as I am…
Webstar: Your kid will be deprived and they will love to come to my place for a good life…
Me: Your kid will love to come to my place for some unadulterated fun…

Cheers to life!

Cheers to impulsive decisions…
Cheers to foolishness…
Cheers to fat ladies…
Cheers to sensible losers…
Cheers to ghosts from the past…
Cheers to looking ahead…
Cheers to difficult friends…
Cheers to sharing…
Cheers to bumpy rollercoaster rides…

Watchdog Millionaire

I finally managed to watch the much talked about “Slumdog Millionaire”- the movie which has captured the attention of all and sundry. It has received its share of bouquets and brickbats- while it has been critically acclaimed and swept almost all the awards (most notably the Golden Globe) and is a definite contender for the Oscars, it has also invited the wrath of many, especially Indian celebrities who inspire a million Bollywood dreams. The movie rocks, but much of the brouhaha generated can be attributed to the controversies it has stirred- as they say, there is no such thing called bad publicity.

If you notice carefully, the secret to critical acclaim is no longer a secret. There is a definite method to this madness in the name of art- the global audience and the critics love to hate India, they derive a perverse pleasure in India’s squalor, its sleazy underbelly, its slums, corruption and dirty politics, it has a feel-good factor for them and elicits a pseudo superiority complex. Sex sells, but so does the rickshaw pullers of India. And if you are smart enough, you will find a way to make money and fame out of it- “City of Joy” hardly had any element of joy in it, “Shantaram” exploited Mumbai with immense success and the latest kid in the block Aravind Adiga made it big with his Man Booker winning novel, “The White Tiger”- again a dark portrayal of all that is not-so-great about India.

But as an Indian why are we taking it so personally? You can’t accuse Danny Boyle, the director of Slumdog… of misrepresenting India because whatever the movie portrays is a glaringly honest account of what goes on in the slums of Mumbai. Amitabh Bacchhan may rave and rant in his blog but I am sure Danny dearest is not complaining! We know that Mumbai isn’t only about slums or the underworld or corrupt politicians, we know that it’s only one side of the story and there is more to Mumbai than what’s been shown onscreen, so why give in to this provocation and give the movie more than its due share of importance? Talking about it only adds to its glamour. Why can’t we be a secure and mature audience who goes into the theatre, enjoys the 2 hours of cinematic saga and leave it behind without getting all judgmental or without feeling this sudden patriotic surge of a vindicated citizen? Let the world concentrate on “Slumdog” while we focus on “Millionaire”…

50 Questions!

Since my blog is a completely unabashed exercise of self revelation, here is another quick way of redifining myself!! Nothing creative about it, I read it, I liked it, and I stole it... You can steal it too...

1. When you looked at yourself in the mirror today, what was the first thing you thought?
- Arggggh!!! I AM FAT…
2. How much cash do you have on you?
- 28 bucks... spent a lot on PIFF and FOOD
3. What’s a word that rhymes with DOOR?
- CHOR…
4. Favorite planet?
- Earth since it accepted me as I am, no questions asked. But Venus definitely has a certain aspirational value…

5. Who is the 4th person on your missed call list on your cell phone?
- Airtel buggers… I don’t pick up their calls

6. What is your favorite ring tone on your phone?
- “The Departed” soundtrack (it makes me look cool- the last thing I am)…

7. What outfit are you wearing?
- Short skirt (I am at home, so perverts stay away)…

8. Do you label yourself?
- My friends call me a cheapo… works for me as I intend to live by it

9. Name the brand of the shoes you’re currently wearing?
- Unbranded chappals (picked up from roadside for 50 bucks)…

10. Bright or Dark Room?
- Depends on my company…

11. What do you think about the person who took this survey before you?
- I have no idea – I stole it from a frustrated MBA guy who writes funny…

12. What does your watch look like?
- Watch? What watch? I have a cell phone to tell time…

13. What were you doing at midnight last night?
- taking a luxurious bath…ahhhhhh
14. What did your last text message you received on your cell say?
- It was from the Airtel buggers offering some useless scheme. Airtel and Placements Committee are the only entities who sms me regularly without fail…

15. Where is your nearest convenience store?
- On campus (Sweety Stores) but it is more an inconvenience store given the obnoxious prices they charge…

16. What's a word that you say a lot?
- Eff Off

17. Who told you he/she loved you last?
- My dad… he says it twice a day! “Children need love, especially when they don’t deserve it”…

18. Last furry thing you touched?
- My red coat…

19. How many drugs have you done in the last three days?
- None… (sigh!!! Am not that cool)

20. How many rolls of film do you need developed?
- None. Please. It’s a digital world and I’m living in it... (how old is this survey!?!)

21. Favorite age you have been so far?
- 21 was good…happy memories, new experiences, first paycheque

22. Your worst enemy?
- My mind. Although Subbu Sir and my running nose are running a close second.

23. What is your current desktop picture?
- Me looking awesome… (a rare pic indeed)

24. What was the last thing you said to someone?
- I don’t think Africans are ugly at all…

25. If you had to choose between a million bucks or to be able to fly what would it be?
- A million. I can learn flying in my own plane.


26. Do you like someone?
- You betcha. I am a single woman in good condition, looking for a man in any condition…

27. The last song you listened to?
- “Rama Re”… the music in the bus sucks (I am from the Mozart school of thought)

28. What time of day were you born?
- 3:40 pm. That explains why I am sleepy most of the times…

29. What’s your favorite number?
- 2 (only even prime number, the no. of husbands I will have, the no. of children I want to have, the no. of Oscars I am going to win, the no. of near death experiences I will have, the last one actually resulting in death)…

30. Where did you live in 1987?
- Kolkata

31. Are you jealous of anyone?
- Truth be told – yep.

32. Is anyone jealous of you?
- Who who who who??? Yippie!!! I sure hope so, but unlikely!!

33. Where were you when 9/11 happened?
- Sleeping in my bed, worrying about board exams…

34. What do you do when vending machines steal your money?
- Kick the bloody things…

35. Do you consider yourself kind?
- Yes and no…

36. If you had to get a tattoo, where would it be?
- Around my belly button to take away the attention from the excess fat…

37. If you could be fluent in any other language, what would it be?
- French… (I tried and I failed)

38. Would you move for the person you loved?
- Yes…

39. Are you touchy feely?
- What kinda question is this. Depends on the person i'm with. I can’t be touchy feely with my Statistics teacher, but with Rahul Bose, I wouldn’t mind…

40. What’s your life motto?
- Live and let die…

41. Name three things that you have on you at all times?
- Cell phone (even though it’s as fat as I am), wallet, my sarcasm…

42. What’s your favorite town/city?
- Mumbai and its live and let live attitude…

43. What was the last thing you paid for with cash?
- Cold Coffee at E square… yummmmm

44. When was the last time you wrote a letter to someone on paper and mailed it?
- A month back… my invoice

45. Can you change the oil on a car?
- Car? What car? I strongly believe in Gandhigiri… I WALK!!

46. Your first love: what is the last thing you heard about him/her?
- You are too good for me (translation: I am too good for u)…

47. How far back do you know about your ancestry?
- About three generations. I have some work to do, don’t I…

48. The last time you dressed fancy, what did you wear and why did you dress fancy?
- Red top, jeans, black shoes (check orkut photos for details)- I looked fat and ugly but it was new year’s eve and people were too busy fretting about their own appearances to really notice…

49. Does anything hurt on your body right now?
- My tummy… I over ate the Pongal Lunch

50. Have you been burned by love?
- Absolutely. But no, I’m not going to spill the details…

PIFF PFAFF!

So 3rd sem results were declared yesterday- no nasty surprises there, one internal backlog that I had earned myself way back in September was the only hitch. Obviously, the rest of the grade sheet wasn’t a pretty picture, but I couldn’t care less as I don’t have to reappear for any of the papers. But now that I am almost through with my MBA, I think I should have studied harder. Well, in the next couple of months of what would hopefully be my last struggle with formal education (ugggh) I intend to make amends, I intend to LEARN- something I haven’t done in the past 20 years. So, I am going to READ, READ and READ!

Anyways the new year has started on a new note- I am trying out new things like the Pune International Film Festival (PIFF). After registering for my student pass for 300 bucks I get to watch unlimited movies- foreign language films from different countries, most of them nominated for some award or the other. Obviously, given my limited general knowledge and even more limited exposure to culture and politics of different countries, I find it extremely hard to follow what’s been portrayed on the silver screen or appreciate the subtle nuances of local customs. As a result, most of the wry humour or poignant tragedy is wasted on me and very often after 90 mins of struggle, I come out of the theatre, sheepishly wondering, “Now exactly what did happen out there?” But nevertheless, I am fascinated with my brush with “intellectualism”. I like this speed-dating with the pot-pouri of culture and the ways of life in different countries, I am surprised that there is a whole new world beyond Bollywood and Hollywood, and I am amazed the emotional appeal that war movies have with critics. Of course, it’s a struggle to keep up that pretence of being dignified, culturally educated, and an intellectual snob. Somehow I don’t fit in with that image of being the arty types, complete with jeans and Fab India kurta and jhola and junk jewelry, but yeah I am trying- partly by not talking (so that I don’t give myself away), partly by hanging around with my “educated” friends and mostly by being all stiff and proper and pretending to flip through the catalogue between movies so as to appear like a veteran PIFFer. However, in spite of all this social struggle I am happy with myself, that I am doing something different (other than my usual routine of eating, sleeping, surfing the net, shopping, gossiping in the cafeteria and fretting about weight), that I am adding some “value” to my personality and that I can proudly talk to people about something “deep” in social get togethers- usually I run out of topics of conversation after 5 mins when I have exhausted expressing my opinion about the Indian cricket team!

2009!!!

It’s January 2009 but as always I am left behind in this race towards… I don’t know! Every time I think about the last few months I can’t help referring to the events as if it “just happened”- like my brother got married this year (which I missed by the way… Subbu, I do hope you are reading- this is the meanest college EVER!), recession, stock market crash, 26/11, and most importantly, me getting a job- but hang on: all of these happened- wait for it- LAST YEAR!!! Yes, call me dyslexic, but even in school, I had this problem: for the first two months of the year, I kept writing the date wrong on the top right hand corner of the copy. By March, just as I was getting used to the new year feel, it was time for exams, and nobody really cared that I have eventually caught up! Sigh… childhood traumas haunt you forever!!

But 2008 was probably one year that was like a national (or global) nightmare, and we have never been more relieved on 31st December as we finally said goodbye to one of the most crisis laden twelve months. Personally it’s been quite a ride, but since one of my new year resolutions is to be positive and move ahead without looking back, I am not going to do my usual month-wise post-mortem of the year gone by… (an exercise which totally enamors me)… Talking about moving ahead, and new year resolutions (whoever said new year resolutions were so 16-ish, just doesn’t have the youthfulness of dreaming about impossible things), I simply love the ritual of making a whole new beginning and then starting all over again at the same place, only a year older!

Like for instance, losing weight has been a resolution since the last ten years, and it still hasn’t happened, but it continues to top the list of my resolutions. The rest… well, I am keeping mum about them, because I am serious about them, so no blabbering (incidentally, no blabbering also features in my updated resolutions list)… so let’s hope 2009 makes me a better person (or at least a thinner person) and that my troubles are as fickle as my resolutions…