TRAGEDY!!

I don’t know what to do, I am so confused, I am shattered! This is the biggest ever tragedy that has befallen me. This is not any mundane problem like failing exams, financial crisis, family problems, career choices or broken relationships- so I don’t even know how to deal with it! I can’t read, I can’t work, I can’t even sleep properly. I have tried looking for solutions on the net, I have asked people, but it all seems so clichéd, so futile…

So ok, what’s this huge, elephantine problem that is bothering me? I am pregnant, or rather I look like I am! Hyderabad has been one big party for me with all the sinful indulgences- food, food and more food! So at the end of seven weeks, I find myself 4 kilos heavier, two sizes bigger and trust me, it takes all the fun out of shopping. And what am I without shopping? It’s like I have been ripped off my identity, the only thing that defines me! And I have a wedding to attend next month with the Sale season due in two months, so it’s of utmost importance that I lose weight, and I lose it fast!

So please stop smirking and help me: it may not seem to be a big deal to most of you, but it’s important to me! I can’t help being shallow and stupid and insecure! Hmmmphhhh….

Pursuit of Happyness...

Well, this part of my life is called… hedonism!

Paradise Regained:And it’s not John Milton we are talking about. I have always heard about the famous Hyderabadi biryani and have secretly wondered, what’s the big deal anyways. After all, it’s just rice and chicken with a few artificial flavours thrown in. But all those half-baked ideas where abandoned forever when we pigged out at a certain place called ‘Paradise’: I described it as a ‘temple’ when I took my first spoonful, and by the time I finished, I realized that it was an understatement.

Our Place: No, I am not inviting you, but if you are in Hyderabad, don’t miss out on this open-air restaurant: it’s the prefect ambience to enjoy a blissful romantic dinner with candle-light, gentle breeze, the verdant seating arrangement, and if you are lucky, a few drops of rain…and if possible, don’t repeat my mistake of going with a bunch of rowdy, shameless friends.

Serengeti: If you want to experience the African Safari without going to Africa, this could be your ticket to wilderness of the wild. An innovative concept with great ambience, it’s definitely a place to celebrate all occasions.

Chutneys: If you freak out on South Indian food as much as I do, then you run the risk of finding yourself in the long queue outside the bistro any time after 8 p.m., especially on weekends. But its authenticity is unparalleled and even if the lassi costs more than the autofare, for once I am willing to pay the price (over and over again)

Well, as you can guess, with all this pigging out, I have started looking like a pig too. Right now my weight has hit a personal best, and my shopping woes a personal worst… anyways before I get into my trial room traumas, a final word about Hyderabadi Pearls: I know absolutely nothing about them, but I liked what I saw, and again I splurged like there’s no tomorrow.

May be money can’t buy happiness, but it surely makes the Pursuit of Happyness more fulfilling…

Beyond Barriers!

Friday Night Fever: and fever it was, literally! I have no reservations against people who make a fool of themselves AND pay obscene amounts of money for all the mindless obscenity which crosses all boundaries of professional comfort, as long as I am not a part of it. But given a choice, I don’t like to go to conventionally “happening” places, and yeah, I am not ashamed to admit that I have hardly been to any of the “cool” places in spite of being in Mumbai for over four years! I would rather stay at home, curl up with a book or chat with close friends and munch on junk food: all for free…

Tryst with the Reel: Finally on Saturday we braved the scorching sun and set off for the much hyped Ramoji Film City. Some 28 of us, basically whoever is interning in Hyderabad, got together for the expedition and it was quite an experience of sorts. Coordinating nearly thirty people was no mean feat and wherever we went, we created chaos! The artificial sets which brought the Chor Bazaar of Mumbai, the Taj Mahal, the Mughal Gardens, the Swiss Bank, the London roads right next to one another, which made it possible for the same building to be the University from one side and the High Court from the other, made us go around the world in thirty minutes! But even after the tour guide’s dramatic narrative sequined with dollops of humour, it still remained the poor man’s ticket to the vicarious pleasures of Bollywood dreams. The shows, the rides, the games and the food stalls were a perfect recipe for keeping the children occupied (and in some cases, even 20 something, excitable people who suddenly discovered the child in themselves). I wouldn’t have missed it for anything, but at the same time, I wouldn’t like to revisit it. It’s a great business idea, and I would be content to admire it on the movies! Next time I see Shahrukh Khan romancing a heroine young enough to be his daughter in a beautiful locale, I will take it with a pinch of salt.

One Wild Night: So you have four girls, all newly rich, you have a mega sale with all brands at dirt cheap prices, and then you have Ice Station: and in no time, you are back to square one, i.e. poor college girl bargaining with the autowala! I was determined that I wouldn’t shop anymore till I lose weight, but I am ashamed at my lack of self restraint and every time I stare at the bill, I am overcome with guilt. But there was no such guilt when we devoured the Triple Sundae ice cream AND the Dieter’s Revenge (yess, they have such kick-ass flavours) along with pizza and French fries at Ice Station. It was so awesome (one of my friends described it as “orgasmic”) that whoever stopped to breathe was losing out on her share… and to end a perfect evening on a memorable note, we decided to get drunk! So the cheapest available vodka was smuggled inside the room, and, well, it was a night of getting high, throwing up, crying and confessions. Sadly, I was more of a sober observer rather than an active participant (well somebody has got to listen and clean up) even though I was drinking after nearly a year… at times experience can be a real dampener!

Bohemian Rhapsody!

It was the Summer of 69,
It was time for Seasons in the Sun,
It was A Beautiful Day,
Everyday- I Want it That Way!

It was A Wonderful Wonderful World,
It was Hysteria,
It was The Sweetest Thing,
We were-The Sultans of Swing!

It was The Road to El-Dorado,
It was the Paradise City,
It was The Stairway to Heaven,
From This Moment On, we were Frozen!

We were Crazy,
We were Crying,
We were Jaded,
But we Walk On- To the Moon and Back!

Hyderabad Blues!

Money for nothing: Well, this weekend I got to live the Dire Straits dream of “Money for nothing, chicks for free”- at least the first part of it! Yeah, I got my first month’s stipend and all for nothing. As in I do go to office and I do “work” for nine hours, five days a week, but well, it just doesn’t seem like work… I get to read and write and learn: things I usually do for free!

Bickering with autowalas:That’s one thing I am NOT going to miss about Hyderabad- the autowalas. Since I stay in the outskirts, every weekend when I plan to go to the city, I have to struggle through crowded buses (which are few and far between) or bargain with the autowalas. So the first benefactor of my stipend was this one guy who literally took me for a ride yesterday and charged me 120 bucks for a twenty minute journey! Well, I knew he had tampered with the meter, but hindsight is not very helpful…

No free lunches: So we met up at Parinita’s place- some 8 of us from college who are currently interning in Hyderabad. Her mom cooked an awesome lunch and especially the aloo was simply out of this world. But then, somebody had the bright idea that since I am noveau rich, I should pay for dessert and all of them made sure they had the most expensive ice-cream! So what I thought will be a free lunch, ended up being an expensive trip, thanks to swindling autowala and fleecing “friends”…

Dressing Down: One thing I love about Deloitte is the informal and casual attitude- no Sirs, no red-tapism, no fawning to seniors and yeah, no dress code. As in you have to wear formals four days a week, but unlike in college, nobody is there to morally police you, and your exam papers don’t get scrapped for wearing sleeveless. So I have carried my “daring” collection which hasn’t seen the light of day in the last one year. And Friday being casual day, I usually have a ball as I finally get to wear my skirts and fancy tops. But this week, HR lady jokes: “Hmm SCMHRD right? You guys have all sorts of restrictions… aish kar lo in do mahine mein”. Now was that a “friendly’ warning or what?

Choodi Bazaar: So what happens when one guy is stranded with five girls in a place like Choodi Bazaar next to Char Minar? Well, the guy has enough time to think about all his past sins and wonder why the hell he is paying for it all at once… but being one of the girls, I had a blast as I lost myself in all the cheap thrills and glitters and ended up buying some four dozen bangles, all for a paltry 100 bucks! And yeah, I flaunt my new found obsession with gaudiness even in office and take a perverse pleasure in inviting disgusted looks from all the classy, well-pearled ladies from Banjara Hills…