Friday, December 19, 2008

Inside out...

Now that we are in the middle of the placement process, especially this being the recession year and recruitments being freezed, we really really appreciate the trauma of sitting through endless inane GDs, tiring interviews, mindless psychometric tests and we really really try very hard to suppress our urge to speak our minds, but as they say, honesty isn’t exactly what companies are looking for! The mantra is, “Be yourself, but not too much…”

So if you do happen to struggle your way through an interview after mind boggling written tests or vicious fishmarkets (a.k.a. group discussions), be prepared with the most ridiculous, yet popular questions asked by most panelists:

So, tell me about yourself…
Uhhmm… Are you really really interested? Well, once upon a time, in a small village of Pathankot, was born a beautiful princess called Pinky Braganza…. And so on and so forth…

What are your strengths and weaknesses?Strengths:
Well, I am an expert in flirting… my sole achievement at B school has been my six boyfriends and that too when I have three more outside college and an outstation boyfriend of three years.
Weaknesses: Well, I used to be an adolescent mass murderer…

Where do you see yourself five years from now?
Obviously in your chair harassing a poor student…

Why do you want to join our organization?
Because the organization I am interested in is not interested in me, and you buggers are all I have…

Give us one reason why we should take you.
Because you don’t have better options, and neither do I. So let’s just stop this farce and get on with it…

Well, now that I have got it out of my system, I feel better!! Obviously none of these answers can be used during an actual interview- so keep that fake smile on, and do memorize all the inane business quotations which you can inappropriately apply in the wrong contexts!

3 comments:

usha said...

hilarious!keep this funny nside up

Dew Drop said...

Hey,

You've got a lovely style of writing :)

Bold and hilarious :)

Keep writing,

Will read the other posts soon.

Deepa

webstar said...

:D