Tears in Heaven...

So it was the last day… those 689 days were finally over… our room was turned upside down as we moaned all the shopping we had done in two years, all the coffee mugs and bowls and plates and dabbas and blankets that we never used and as we squealed in unexpected delight as long lost pens and hair clips and watches turned up when we had given up all hope of ever finding them. The guys made it easier: they simply donated all their clothes to charity with the excuse that they needed a wardrobe makeover (well, we do agree)… and we left, just like that, struggling with 21 pieces of luggage! We hugged repeatedly, we made excuses to come back, we cracked silly jokes and pulled each others’ legs trying to prove that we were fine, that it was just a little break for holidays and things will be same as before, that we were not choking back tears. Some of us cried, some of us laughed louder than usual and some of us just sat quietly like zombies… there were souvenirs distributed, snaps taken, landline numbers exchanged, promises to come back, promises to meet up, promises to keep in touch, while we all knew secretly that things will never be quite the same.

I didn’t cry, I didn’t joke, I didn’t laugh a little louder than I usually do, and I didn’t even sit like a zombie. I dealt with it in my way, by revisiting the past, albeit it was different, but it was the past all the same. And then I cried: not howled, just a few drops of tears: silent, dignified, heartfelt…